ChiChi In Real Life
by Kasimyer Kore
Summary: Set in different times in the Z series: several short stories about real life told in the view point of Chi-Chi and the best friend who helps her through it all. Rated M for adult subjects.


Chi-Chi Rising

"This one looks cute, doesn't it? I think it would totally compliment my figure…"

I was completely shocked and dumbfounded. How could these women be so small, so think and frail? Could this really be what men go for?

"Bulma, I don't think even Vegeta would approve of you wearing something like that in public…"

"No, silly! Lingerie is for _bed_! It's supposed to make your man go crazy inside so you can expect some passionate, hot… well, you know!" Bulma said with a little wink.

I laughed in return, pretending to know exactly what she was talking about. I had never seen such vulgar clothing on a woman before, but apparently this new magazine specialized in displaying these poor, degraded women for advertising purposes. I glanced at the cover. "Roshi's Secret: New Fall Swimsuits now on sale! LOOK INSIDE!" Roshi… oh god, that disgusting man! Is this what he's up to know?

"I ordered this a while back before I had my augmentation. It really put some curves on where I never had. You might want to take a peak."

Curves? Augmentation? Have I been living under a rock this whole time? Wait… does that mean she actually has plastic inside her body?

It was a leopard-print girdles with netted fabric running down the torso connecting the two pieces of fabric down the sides with the bra and pantie blatantly popping out against the model's black skin shopping for the gazes of some poor man who takes pleasure in looking through these things. The second shot portrayed the back of the girdle and the laced black fabric crisscrossing the curves and bores of her back.

"I've never worn anything like this before, Bulma. I don't think it suits me," I said, trying to avoid the subject and move on to "Capsules and Gardens Magazine". Now _there's _a publication I can get into.

"_Pssshh_! Oh, Chichi. Don't you know? This is the kind of stuff _every _man loves! Trust me! You'll look just smashing! And I know Goku will go ga-ga…" she said with a sing-song inflection in her voice. A foreign victim to peer pressure, I reached across the table for my wallet. What on earth was I doing?

Four to six weeks later, I found myself staring at a classic, brown package my son had dragged in front of the doorway for me to pick up. I was afraid to open it. It had the Roshi's Secret logo of a turtle in a bra smacked on top of the box. I hope to the heavens that Gohan didn't know what that was. Well, it wasn't going to just grow legs and go anywhere, although I wished it would just vanish and I would tell Bulma that it was lost in the mail, or sent to some poor woman in a poor village somewhere who would love a nice piece of clothing even if it would lay her just as bare as without. I sighed and brought out my sharp knife from the cupboard. This is for Goku, this is for Goku…

He didn't come home from training with Gohan until it was almost time for dinner. After pigging out, of course, Gohan was more than willing to head down the "sleepytown train". I put my good, little boy to bed and decided that now would be a good time to show Goku my new and improved sexual side. Bulma's voice danced around in my head. "OK, now remember, Chi-chi. Throw that thing on and have fun with it! You're a beautiful woman when you wear this bad boy, and Goku loves every second of you wearing it! Show him what you're made of!" I secretly walked into the bathroom while Goku sat in front of the TV watching the evening comedy run. The package was there, perfectly hidden in the little sanctuary of the master bedroom. I often had to run in here and freshen up before and after spending exquisite quality time with Goku. Who knows? Maybe after slipping into this little thing, I'll ensure a most pleasing. hot shower sometime tomorrow morning instead.

I drew it out of the box, the tiny, little girdle that accentuate every single one of my curves and make Goku long to be back home everyday, and I will be the most beautiful and sexy woman alive, and I will have all the power over my husband so he won't want to fight anymore, and then Gohan will want to follow and not want to fight either and focus on his studies, and all the while I'll have a better sex-life than Bulma!!!....

I took a deep breath. OK, maybe I'm going a little overboard with my little gift to Goku, but at least it's a start to eventually running my household MY way. I glanced again at the girdle, this time with a new focus and realized a more serious problem. How ON EARTH do you put this thing on? I turned it over, upside down, wiggled the inside, tried to straighten all the straps, and picked up my phone ready to call Bulma for help. But wait, then I'll really look like an idiot. She'll really know that I have no idea what I'm doing and am no better in bed than a young and foolish virgin. No, after tonight I'm am Bulma's equal. We will talk tomorrow and both bathe in our womanhood and celebrate the fact that we can control our men with the glory of our bodies. Yes, tonight will be most glorious... at least If I can find a way to get this thing on.

At least an hour and a half of comedy for Goku had passed until I was completely ready for the evening's activities. Not only did I finally put on the new contraption, but I also made-up my face and fixed my hair just down with a little curl. I looked at myself in the mirror for the last time before my glorious ascension to my throne as ultimate pleasure tool and thought, boy! I don't think I've ever been so sexy! I stepped off in a strut towards the couch. He heard me walk through the threshold. "Hey, Chi-Chi! You're missing a good one tonight!" I said nothing and slowly walked up behind him to caress his wild, unruly hair. Oh yes, he will be an animal tonight! I bent down and whispered in his ear in the most sensual manner I could possibly muster, "are you ready for bed yet, Goku honey?" He smiled nonchalantly and bent his head backward. "Well, i can see you do! But this is almost finished. Ten more minutes OK, Chi-chi babe?" I giggled a little bit, drew my hand to his shoulder, and began to walk in front of that dreaded electronic contraption. My hips swayed back and forth, my legs kept nice and tight together and scraped each other with each step making that little, sexy fabric sound, and my hair swayed back and forth across my shoulders, bouncing up and down like my well-fluffed chest. I stood straight in front of him, taking his eyes and mind off of anything else and all on me. His jaw began to drop a little. His eyes began to widen a little. I knew this would work! "Chi-Chi... where did you get... this?". I flicked my hair back. "Oh... it's just a little something I dug out of my closet". That's right, Chi-Chi, keep it nice and cool. "You look... you look..." Great? Magnificent? Sexy? Like a goddess?????

"Like a weird bug..."

My heart sank.

"No no, you're supposed to be a cheetah, right?"

My smile dropped.

"HA HA HA HA! Oh Chi-Chi! Great job! You did much better than the comedy show, cause you are just hilarious! Tell me, what on earth gave you the idea to dress like this?"

And he fell over the couch laughing his head off out loud. I looked down at myself in despair. Did I do something wrong? Am I just something to laugh at after all? I was ashamed, crushed, horribly depressed. I immediately ran to the bedroom in tears and anger. I couldn't even yell at him this time. Goku called after me, and naturally, I didn't respond. He would be sleeping right where he watches that stupid TV tonight. How dare he compare my attempts to please him to his beloved slap-stick and humorously dry skits. He knocked on the bedroom door. "Aw, Chi-Chi, come on! I didn't mean to laugh at you like that." I sniffed. "Then what WERE you laughing at, Goku? That's just how you are, you think everything I do is a joke! Well, I'm sick of it! I try to be hardworking and kind and understanding, and yielding to everything you do, and yes! I even try to be sexy for you and all you ever do is laugh at me and... I try so hard..." I sobbed. He leaned closer to the door.

"That's just it, Chi-Chi. You don't even have to try". I immediately stopped crying. His voiced changed. every time he does that I get a little, nervous tingle deep in my chest. "Can I come in now?" he asked gently. I didn't respond, but instead cradled my legs closer to my chest on the bed. He took that as a yes and opened the door. To my surprise, the TV was off and the house was quiet. He looked at me and my little body on the bed and smiled sweetly. I was vulnerable, and he treasured the moment before he closed the door behind him and joined me on the bed. His strong arms wrapped around me, and I let him. He owed me.

"Chi-Chi, you don't think I appreciate everything you do for me? I do! I do so much! You work so hard to teach our son, you cook and shop, and the kitchen's always full of these amazing smells and tastes. What man wouldn't want to come home to a woman like you? I love you, Chi-Chi. It's not that I'm laughing at what you do, it's just that you don't even have to try to be sexy!"

I stayed quiet, listening to all he was telling me. He took a strap from my girdle in his hand, let it fall to the bed and then listed his hand to caress my cheek and run it through my hair. He was examining me.

"Not that I don't like this. It's just that you don't need it", he whispered. My eyes widened. If it is impossible to fall in love with one man over and over again, I have just made the Roshi's Book of World Records. I melted in his soft voice. "And darling," he said, taking one more look at my cheetah ensemble. "You know this is just going to come off anyway..."

I wiped my eyes and smiled back, giggling like a little school girl, and allowed him to begin the complicating task of taking my girdle off which of course didn't last long because he ended up ripping it to shreds anyway.

So this is why I married Goku. I don't need fancy lingerie or sexy lipstick and hair to please him. I with Bulma could say the same, cause as of right now, I've got a pretty good deal for a husband... even though my recent Roshi's Secret purchase is going to drive us both into major debt.


End file.
